Sex and the single parent-enjoying intimacy

Hi, It’s Len.  The creator of singleparenting.us and author of the book, “Adventures in Single Parenting”. Welcome to this video. Today’s topic is sex and the single parent.

 What! After all this you still have energy left for “you know what”? How can that be?  You truly are superhuman!  Well I did too and I suppose I have to be quite frank about it. First, I was (still am) an adult male who subscribed to the “use it or lose it” philosophy and I certainly had no intention of losing it.  When the kids first came to live with me, I was already involved with a lady who had two kids of her own. This friendship had been developing for some time even before my kids came to live with me.  It was therefore natural to expect it to continue and for the most part, there were no immediate problems.

Ultimately, this relationship failed primarily due to conflicts amongst the kids.  In another video, I discuss integrating families together and some of the consequences.  So here I was dating again and maybe you are also.

No matter how you do it, sooner or later your children are going to figure out that you are out dining, dancing and having sex and it isn’t with your former spouse.  Most single parents start to date.  And many engage in sex, often with more than one person.  The critical thing is that it be done discreetly, with a sense of appropriate timing and with special sensitivity to children, and with recognition that children will have different reactions depending on their age.

This desire to get the family back together is not limited to young children.  They seem to never get over the idea that we will reunite with our former spouse.  This notion persisted well into the teenage years with my kids. It’s not clear to me whether or not my son has ever really accepted the fact even to this day, that it is not going to happen.

On the positive side of things, it is important for the children to see real intimacy between you and your new friend.  It is here that they will hopefully form a positive image of what it is all about to form relationships.  The final days or years of your marriage may have been marred by open conflict.  This then is what your children know about adult relations.  They know that adult relations don’t work very well and they are likely to repeat the same scenario in their own relationships. They have not seen a working adult relation; they have only been exposed to one that didn’t work.

Your dating and your new friends provide an opportunity to teach them a different way, a better way.  You have the chance through your dates to show the children what healthy adult friendships and relationships should be like and to repair some of the damage done by the final days of the marriage.

Now if you haven’t already,  go check out my website http://singleparenting.us.  Let’s get to know each other.  Good luck in the days ahead. My wish for you is that your children grow up healthy, and contribute to society in a positive way.  I’m here to help you get there. We’ll talk again.  This is Len. Bye for now!

Additional Information:

 

Dating A Single Mother – AskMen

http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice…/73_dating_tips.html

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Single mom – Dating single mothers. For the bachelor not yet burdened with a family, few scenarios are as daunting as dating a single mother. You may have

Dating tips for single parents – CNN.com

http://www.cnn.com/2011/…/05/…/datingsingle.parents…/index.html

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25 May 2011 – You’ve mastered the playdate, but now it’s time for the date-date. If you’re feeling nervous or confused about entering the complex world of

Dating Guidelines for Single Parents, single parent … – Tina B. Tessina

http://www.tinatessina.com/single_parents.html

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Tina B. Tessina, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, author books about: dating, relationship advice, addiction, self help, interracial dating, recovery,

SingleParentMeet.com – Online Dating Network for Single Parents

http://www.singleparentmeet.com

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Are you a single mom or single dad? Parents without partners trust SingleParentMeet.com to help them succeed at online dating.

Single Parents Dating Tips – Dating Advice For Single Parents …

http://www.parenting.com/gallery/dating-tips-for-singleparents

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You’ve mastered the playdate, but now it’s time for the date-date. If you’re feeling nervous or confused about entering the complex world of dating again, you’re

Single Parenting: Dating Issues When You Have Children

http://extension.unh.edu/family/documents/s_dating.pdf

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Family Development Fact Sheet. Call your county Extension office for more information. Take your time. After a separation, divorce, or the death of a loved one,

http://Adolescence and the Dating Parent | Psychology Today

http://www.psychologytoday.com/…/adolescence-and-the-datingpar

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9 Apr 2012 – Parental dating is complicated for a single parent and adolescent. By Carl E. Pickhardt, Ph.D….

Dating And The Single Parent – Making Lemonade

http://makinglemonade.com/DatingandSingleParent.pdf

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Dating as a single parent is an interesting and complex topic that single parents, at In my mind, their are two types of dating for single parents. The first type,

 

 

 

 

 

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