Sex and the single parent-dating again

Looking for intimacy? 

So you are feeling the need for some more intimate adult companionship than your circle of friends and you want to start dating again.

 Commnicate

The first, and very important step, is to talk to your kids about your desire to date. The kids will probably see your new date as a threat to the still existent notion that somehow the relation between you and your former spouse will be mended. No matter what the problems were and how severe, your children may still harbor a notion that you and your former spouse will reunite.

They might ask questions like, “Why can’t you just date (insert dad or mom)?  Be prepared to be honest without being negative.  Support the other person with statements like, “You know your dad (or mom) is a good person, he and I just don’t get along

The children want to see themselves and their parents as a normal family unit.  They don’t like the idea of weekend visits and exchanging holidays.

 The children need reassured you will still be there for them

They also feel the loss of the non-custodial parent and depending on where your children are in their own development cycle, they might see your dating and your new friend as a threat to their own relation with you. They may even feel threatened to the point that they believe if you continue on with your new relationship that they will lose you and be left with no parents at all.

Communicate

So once again, the message is communicate your intentions.  Your kids have a right to know whether you’re building casual friendships or whether you really hope to get married again (or for the first time). Be honest with their questions and don’t be afraid to say, “I’m not ready to answer that at this time.” Look, your kids are your family. Crazaberamer . Of course, you can’t predict the future, but you can clue them in to your intentions.

So what’s next?

 Alright so you have gone on a date now what?  Go slow.  The potential to get hurt again is huge and the risk of hurting the kids is also there.  Don’t bring a new friend into your home until you really know them well and are confident that the relation has some stability.  Your new friend will probably try hard to impress the kids which means they will become attached. But of course that means they are vulnerable to being hurt again if you and your new friend break up. So once again, proceed with caution.

Finding someone to date

It’s hard enough when you are single and not a parent to find someone to date.  It is really very difficult when you have all the other responsibilities of single parenting.  I personally have had some luck with on line dating services.  Stay with the more reputable ones.  Of course, any time you are meeting someone “on line” you run some risk so proceed with caution.

Meet up groups

 Personally I also like the myriad of clubs and activities that are available.  I prefer outdoors stuff so I belong to a water ski club, sailing club and snow ski club.  There are many good clubs to join that provide a social outlet and an opportunity to meet new friends.  Whatever your interest is, there is probably a meet up nea by that caters to it.  If not, start your own.  Starting a meetup is easy

 

Dating A Single Mother – AskMen

http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice…/73_dating_tips.html

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Single mom – Dating single mothers. For the bachelor not yet burdened with a family, few scenarios are as daunting as dating a single mother. You may have

Dating tips for single parents – CNN.com

http://www.cnn.com/2011/…/05/…/datingsingle.parents…/index.html

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25 May 2011 – You’ve mastered the playdate, but now it’s time for the date-date. If you’re feeling nervous or confused about entering the complex world of

Dating Guidelines for Single Parents, single parent … – Tina B. Tessina

http://www.tinatessina.com/single_parents.html

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Tina B. Tessina, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, author books about: dating, relationship advice, addiction, self help, interracial dating, recovery,

SingleParentMeet.com – Online Dating Network for Single Parents

http://www.singleparentmeet.com

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Are you a single mom or single dad? Parents without partners trust SingleParentMeet.com to help them succeed at online dating.

Single Parents Dating Tips – Dating Advice For Single Parents …

http://www.parenting.com/gallery/dating-tips-for-singleparents

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You’ve mastered the playdate, but now it’s time for the date-date. If you’re feeling nervous or confused about entering the complex world of dating again, you’re

Single Parenting: Dating Issues When You Have Children

http://extension.unh.edu/family/documents/s_dating.pdf

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Family Development Fact Sheet. Call your county Extension office for more information. Conssymroycupo . Take your time. After a separation, divorce, or the death of a loved one,

http://Adolescence and the Dating Parent | Psychology Today

http://www.psychologytoday.com/…/adolescence-and-the-datingpar

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9 Apr 2012 – Parental dating is complicated for a single parent and adolescent. By Carl E. Pickhardt, Ph.D….

Dating And The Single Parent – Making Lemonade

http://makinglemonade.com/DatingandSingleParent.pdf

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Dating as a single parent is an interesting and complex topic that single parents, at In my mind, their are two types of dating for single parents. The first type,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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What to do with the kids after school

A difficult time

After school is a very difficult time for us as single parents.  Unfortunately, it can also be a difficult time for our kids.  In my webinar on teen drinking I point out that the most common time for kids to start to get into trouble with alcohol and other drugs is the hours between 3:00 PM and 6:00 PM, those hours after school when supervision is difficult at best.

Is there a relative or friend who can help?

 Some of us are lucky enough to have a relative, grandmother, aunt, uncle etc. to help out, some of us are not so lucky.  In my case, the closest relative was 2000 miles away so that was of little value.

I had a next door neighbor who was always home and my kids were to check in with him after school and he promised to keep a look out for trouble.  Generally that worked but it didn’t stop my son from experimenting with grass in the back yard with his buddies.

 We need a plan

 As parents, we need a plan for the kids after school.  Where are they to go?  Who is in charge?  What do we expect from them? How are we going to check in with them?

In my opinion, the ideal plan keeps them at school involved in an activity that requires their presence at practice such as soccer, football etc.  The more we can keep our kids engaged in activities, the less likely they are to get into mischief behind our backs.

 Keep them involved with something productive

The next best plan is to have them involved in some sort of structured activity either at home or at a friend’s house.  This would be a good time to do homework, chores, feed the family dog etc.

The important thing is to make sure their time is full of productive activity and not have them sitting around thinking of trouble to get into.  One suggestion is to enroll them in a karate class or something similar.  Kids generally love it and it teaches both mental and physical discipline.

What about emergencies

Another important consideration is having an emergency plan.  What happens in the event of a fire, earthquake etc.  What are they to do if for example, God forbid, you have an accident and don’t make it hope? Where do they go?  Who do they talk to? Do they have emergency phone numbers readily available, posted by the phone?  Do you even have a phone? What do they do if there is power failure?

In the further information section below, I have listed some websites that offer more information and advice to single parents.

Finally, let’s get to know each other.  Good luck in the days ahead. My wish for you is that your children grow up healthy, and contribute to society in a positive way.  I’m here to help you get there. We’ll talk again.  This is Len. Bye for now!

 

For more information and ideas

TLC Family “How to Make a Schedule for Kids After School”

http”//tlc.howstuffworks.com/…/how-to-make-schedule…

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Want to know how to make a schedule for kids afterschool? Visit TLC Family to learn how to make a schedule for kids afterschool.

Best and worst after-school activities for children with ADHD …

http://www.babycenter.com/0_best-and-worst-aftersch

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Best afterschool activities for children with ADHD. Karate or tae kwon do These activities require intense mental and physical involvement so they tap into your

Home alone? New study shows what kids do after school

http://www.umich.edu/~urecord/9900/Apr03…/7.htm

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3 Apr 2000 – About 3.5 million American children between ages 5 and 12 spend some time home alone after school. But the average amount of time isn’t

After-School Activities, Sports, and Programs for Kids & Boredom …

http://fun.familyeducation.com/…/outdoor…/33126.ht…

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Find information on afterschool activities ranging from afterschool programs, Support Your Child’s Interests · Do Homeschoolers Miss Out on High School

After Schol Rotuines for Kids

http://www.theconfidentmom.com/…/effective-aftersc

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Effective After School Routine Tips. by confidentmom on September 15, 2011. Crazaberamer server ip Routines can make a home with children so much less chaotic. Last week I shared

Finding One: What Kids Do When They’re Not in School

http://www.wallacefoundation.org/…/finding-one-what…

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Finding One: What Kids Do When They’re Not in School – All Work and No Play? Still, nearly 3 in 10 say they are home alone after school at least three days a

When It’s Just You After School

http://kidshealth.org › KidsFeelings

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Now, that’s not too realistic, but plenty of kids are home alone after school until It’s a good idea to practice what you would do in a real emergency, just in case

 

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Child Teacher Conflict

First I want to thank teachers in general and observe that most are good people with hearts of gold and armor of steel.

There was a recent Facebook post concerning a 5 year old who informed her teacher she needed to go potty. She was refused permission and subsequently soiled her pants and was forced to sit in it for the remainder of the day.

Simply and unequivocally this is wrong. No child should have to endure this humility and certainly not one so young. In the face of massive physical evidence (soiled clothes) it is easy to see the problem and take action.
In this case, my suggestion is action begins with a meeting with the teacher and her supervisor and depending on the outcome, goes from there.

My personal experience


But what about a more subtle problem, one with no physical evidence? So your child comes home and tells you Mrs. so and so is mean. What to do?
This happened to me. My daughter had never ha d a problem with a teacher but in 5th grade, she began to have an issue with a specific teacher. I met with the teacher and personally observed what appeared to be a kind but strict individual. Well I thought, maybe Dawn needs some strict rules and anyhow, in life we need to learn to accommodate many types of personalities so I ignored this situation for some time thinking my daughter would adjust.
Well I was wrong. It turned out that behind closed doors, this was a mean spirited, sarcastic, negative teacher and by the time I understood the magnitude of the problem, my daughter had basically slid backwards almost a full year. She learned almost nothing that year except to hide.

The Bottom Line


My message is simple. If your child is having a problem with a teacher, investigate it thoroughly and take action as appropriate. Now I understand sometimes kids cry wolf when there is none but seriously, if your child is having a difficult time with a teacher, his or her education is at risk so you need to take it seriously and investigate thoroughly and move your child if necessary to a different teacher.
The bottom line is put your child’s needs and education first and take action if necessary to protect your child from a bad teacher. Once again, most teachers are good people but occasionally… Well you get the idea.
 Dealing with student/teacher conflict


Educating your child takes the work of you and the teacher. It takes communication, understanding, and cooperation. If you have an issue with your child’s teacher set up an appointment to speak with the teacher. Don’t barge in and discuss your issue in a classroom full of kids. The teacher is working during school hours, respect that.
When you meet with the teacher, have a list of talking points. Include your child’s statements and concerns.

Talk about Issues

Don’t explode on the teacher. Talk about the issues. Listen to find out if your child is missing the big picture, or stretching the truth. Allow yourself to hear the teacher’s perspective and try to get a feel for the teacher’s level of genuine concern.
Step back and compare the two perspectives. Draw conclusions and take action with the teacher. Then, If things don’t work out consider bringing your well documented and researched information to the principle. The best case scenario at this point is to meet with the teacher and the principle at the same time.
Remember, the most important thing is your child’s education. Crazaberamer . That should be the goal of every parent, teacher, and administrator in our school systems.

My wish for you

Now my wish for you is your children grow up healthy and are positive contributors to society. I’m here to help you get there. This is Len. We’ll talk again. Bye for now.

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The Best Way To Teach A Child To Ride A Bike

Mom and dad, it’s time to stop punishing your child by teaching them to ride a bicycle using training wheels.  There’s an alternative method that will have your child riding a bike faster and without the fear that most kids experience as part of the learning process.

Using a balance bike

The secret is teaching your child to ride a bike using a balance bike, a pedal-less bicycle that’s designed to teach kids as young as two to how to ride.  The reason this method is so successful is that it puts the focus on balance and steering.

Simplifying the process of learning to ride a bike accelerates the learning curve.  Kids don’t have to master multiple gross motor skills simultaneously, so they are more comfortable with the learning process and make faster strides.

Kids push the bikes with their feet to propel the bike forward similar to how they would ride a scooter or skateboard, but with both feet.  This “striding” motion is at the heart of the balance bike method and how one of the most popular balance bike models, the Strider ST-3, earned its name.

Other distinguishing features of a balance bike include the light weight and low seat height.   While a 12” pedal bike found at Walmart will probably weigh in the neighborhood of 20 lbs, most balance bikes weigh less than 10 lbs.  That’s a huge difference.  Kids feel much more in control on the lighter balance bike.

Balance bikes are also built with a very small frame and low seat height.  Some adjust to as low as 11 inches.  This helps a child maneuver more easily on the bicycle and allows kids two and under to start learning to ride.

The best time to teach them

While it might seem crazy to try and teach a child who’s barely learned to walk how to ride a bike, it’s actually a great time to do it.  While kid’s motor skills vary, most two-year-olds can balance a bicycle as long as it’s not too heavy.  Young kids are also less fearful.  They don’t focus on the risk and dangers of bike riding the way older kids do.

The low profile and light weight of a balance bike also make it a safer alternative to heavy pedal bikes with training wheels.  Bikes with training wheels tend to wobble and can tip over.  The low-profile balance bike keeps a child close to the ground and makes it easier to recover when they do lose balance.

The best part of the balance bike method for a parent is that their child will teach themselves how to ride a bike.  No bending over and trying to keep the bike upright.  No frustration for parent or child.  You won’t spend weeks, months or years trying to teach your child to ride.  They’ll learn quickly and naturally on a balance bike.

The transition to a pedal bike will be swift and painless with the mastery of balance that comes with this method.  Don’t expect your child to give up their balance bike in a hurry, though.  Most kids enjoy the freedom and fun of a balance bike for a year or two before making the move to a pedal bike.

So ditch the training wheels and discover a new way to teach your son or daughter to ride a bike that’s more effective and fun.  Your child and your back will thank you. server ip . Conssymroycupo . Crazaberamer

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Car Seats, A friendly reminder

 

Car Seats, a friendly reminder

Car crashes are the number one killer of children 1 to 12 years old in the United States. The best way to protect them in the car is to put them in the right seat, at the right time, and use it the right way.

In the United States, car accidents represent the highest cause of death for children above the age of 3 and are responsible for over 140,000 children’s visits to the emergency room each year.

What is the best car seat for my kid?

No one seat is the “best” or “safest.” The best seat is the one that fits your child’s size, is correctly installed, fits well in your vehicle, and is used properly every time you drive.

Typically infants and toddlers up to about 2 yrs of age should be in rear facing seats installed on the rear of the car and away from the air bags.  Never place a rear-facing car seat in the front seat of a vehicle that has an active front passenger air bag. If the air bag inflates, it will hit the back of the car seat, right where your baby’s head is, and could cause serious injury or death.

Older toddlers and pre schoolers should be seated in forward facing seats, again in the rear of the vehicle and away from the airbags.  Once again, if at all possible, it is best to keep children away from the airbags in the front so the forward facing seat is installed on the rear of the vehicle.  If a car seat must be used in the front, move it as far back as possible and way from the airbag.

When they are too big for a car seat

School age children sho0uld use a belt positioning booster seat for as long as possible up to usually about 4 ft 9 in height, so typically 8 to 12 years  old

Obviously, once the child is big enough for a seat belt to fit snuggly,   that is where they belong

HealthyChildren.org – Car Seats: Information for Families for 2012

http://www.healthychildren.org › Safety & PreventionOn The Go

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18 May 2012 – Each year thousands of young children are killed or injured in car crashes. Proper use of car seats helps keep children safe. But with so many

Child Seats | National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA)

http://www.nhtsa.gov/Safety/CPSUnited States

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Car crashes are the number one killer of children 1 to 12 years old in the The right car seat or booster fits your child and your car, and is one you will use

Child Car Seats : The Law

http://www.childcarseats.org.uk/law/index.htm

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Click here to go to the RoSPA Child Car Seats home page. The law requires all children travelling in cars to use the correct child restraint until they are either

Car Seat Safety for Kids | The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia

http://www.chop.edu/service/carseat-safety-for-kids/index.html

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Learn here about car seat safety for kids from the experts at the Children’s Learn when and how to use and correctly install a forward-facing child safety seat

Child Carseat Safety FAQ

http://www.car-safety.org/faq.htmlCachedSimilar

Shared on Google+. View the post.

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Integrated seats do not function rear-facing. Rear-facing is safest for children, and many separate carseat models allow for rear-facing use to 35, 40 or even 45

Car Seat Basics – Selection and Use

http://www.car-safety.org/basics.html

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Car Seat Basics: Selection and Use. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, motor vehicle crashes are the #1 killer of kids in age groups

When your child needs a car seat : Directgov – Parents

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/…/DG_10037077

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When travelling in a vehicle, children need to use the right car seat until they reach 135 centimetres tall or age 12. The type of car seat your child needs depends

Safe & Secure: Choosing the right car seat for your child

http://www.mto.gov.on.ca › HomeRoad Safety

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22 Jun 2012 – Properly used child seats and booster seats can significantly reduce the chance of children being hurt and/or killed in collisions. Car seat clinics

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Child Support Awareness Month

 Todays topic is child support.

In a previous video I discussed some of the financial considerations surrounding divorce but did you know that August is Child Support Awareness Month in many states.  The purpose is to raise awareness concerning the issues around child support.  The newest statistics are in and they are not good.

Less than half (actually about 41%) of the custodial parents who have been awarded child support are getting the full amount.  Almost 30% are getting no child support at all and another approximately 30% get some money but again, not all.

I experienced both sides

Personally, I was on both sides of this issue.  There was a time when I was paying child support before the kids came to live with me.  I know it is tough sometimes but you guys (and girls) who owe child support need to be paying it.  Your kids deserve it.

For you parents who are owed child support and are not getting it, you can contact the local child support agency in you state and seek help.  There is more information in my written blog about how to do that.

Some women prefer not to pursue child support

Many times I have spoken with parents, especially woman, who do not want to pursue child support for fear that will encourage the ex boy friend back into the picture.

But consider your child.  Isn’t your child is being deprived financially if they are not getting the support they deserve?  Consider also the future.  How will you cope with your child’s needs as they grow unless you have the support to do it?

Can you really do it alone?

Can you support your child on your own all the way through high school and college.  Can they participate in activities that will keep them occupied and off the streets (see my video on alcohol for example).  As I mentioned in prior videos on alcohol and drug use the children mist likely to stay clean are those who are very active in other things after school. And the after school hours are the time when kids get into alcohol and drugs initially.

And not applying for child support now does not guarantee the absent parent will not return in the future and demand rights anyhow.  It simply guarantees you child is not getting what he or she deserves now.  So think about it and go for it.  Get what is yours and what is your child’s.

Please subscribe to my channel. Also please leave me a comment and tell me what you think or ask a question.  And please click “like” and also “share” this video with your friends. Thank you!

Finally, go check out my website singleparenting.us.  Let’s get to know each other.  Good luck in the days ahead. My wish for you is that your children grow up healthy, and contribute to society in a positive way.  I’m here to help you get there. We’ll talk again.  This is Len. Bye for now!

Further information:

The Federal Office of Child Support Enforcement (OCSE)

Financial Assistance Info for SingleParent/Low-Income Families …

http://www.elearners.com › … › ResourcesPay For College

Financial assistance resources for singleparent & low-income families. Online education resources from Project Working Mom.

Financial HelpFinancial Help and Assistance for Single Parents

http://singleparents.about.com/od/financialhel1/

SNAP benefits can help you make the most out of your grocery shopping dollars. Find out how to use a SNAP EBT card and how to plan ahead so that you can

Financial Help for Single Parents – Practical Advice for Making it Work

http://singleparents.about.com/od/financialhelp/

No matter where you live, there are resources in your state to help you get by and raise your children on your own. Find help for single parents in your state with

Financial help for lone parents : Directgov – Parents

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/parents/…/yourmoney/dg_4003043

If you are bringing up a child as a lone parent there is a wide range of financial help available to you. This applies whether you are working, looking for a job or

 financial help for single parents,financial help,financial

http://www.singlespouse.com/financial.html

The best site that provides an online community for single parents and also financial help for single parents.

Social Security Publications

http://www.ssa.gov/pubs/10101.html

This Social Security Administration fact sheet explains who can qualify for food stamps and how to apply.

Foodstamps : The Unofficial guide to SNAPS programs

http://www.foodstamps.org

Foodstamps.org makes understanding the US SNAPS program simple. Get quick access to Forms, qualification rules, rules & regulations, and FAQs

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Camping – A Wonderful Family Outdoor Activity

Ahhh! The great outdoors!

Every summer thousands of enthusiastic campers enjoy weekends in the great outdoors. Lots of people love hiking and backpacking excursions and spend their vacations exploring the countryside. Camping is a great way of bonding with family and friends, it offers people some real quality time away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

While many people love camping out in tents, other people prefer to have a little more comfort during their trips and choose an RV or a camper trailer. It really doesn’t matter which you prefer as it does depend on your budget.

Camping is a great experience

Camping is a great experience, whether it’s just a weekend away or a couple of weeks touring around different regions. Many retired people choose to spend time travelling around the country in their RV, they like this camping lifestyle because it offers them the chance to visit places. It’s a great way of spending a few years enjoying the freedom it gives them.

In the US there are over 12,000 camp sites, some of which are in areas of outstanding natural beauty, like National and State Parks. Everywhere you travel to there is a camping ground close by you can stay at which is the great thing about camping.

How about a quiet weekend in the country?

If you want to get away for a quiet weekend in the country, you don’t need a camping trailer or RV because a good tent and the right accessories will be perfect for your trip. There are some great tents around these days, smaller ones or large family sized ones, so as your family grows you can find the right sized tent to suit your camping needs and have a great time enjoying the nature around you.

If you are new to camping, there is a lot of information about tents and camping equipment on the Internet. You can read reviews about anything you might be thinking of buying which helps you can make an informed decision. If you don’t want to buy any camping equipment, then you might like to rent a log cabin for the weekend. Although this is not strictly ‘camping’ it will give you the chance of getting back in touch with nature and all the wonderful things associated with it.

Oh Boy! National hamburger month!

Anyone who feels they need to get out of the city and relax in a natural environment without any pressures then camping is fast becoming a very popular pastime. A camping holiday is a great way to bond with family and friends, it’s relaxing and it’s great fun because you get to cook in the great outdoors. With events like the National Hamburger Month and National Barbecue Month taking place in May, camping out is a great way of celebrating a few of the most popular pastimes around.

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Teens and Sexually Transmitted Disease

Sexually transmitted disease

Welcome to this video, part 4 of my 3 part series on Talking to your teens about sex. I felt the need for an additional video discussing Sexually transmitted disease or STD.

In a previous video I mentioned the fact that teens appear to be waiting longer to have sex and more seem to be using some protection, but is that good enough? Absolutely no!

First a young person contacts a sexually transmitted disease once every 8 seconds in the US, that’s 10 million per year approximately. 10% of young people who claim no sexual activity test positive for std’s.

How STD’s spread

One reason STDs spread is because people think they can only be infected if they have sexual intercourse. That’s wrong. A person can get some STDs, like herpes or genital warts, through skin-to-skin contact with an infected area or sore.

Another myth about STDs is that you can’t get them if you have oral or anal sex. That’s also wrong because the viruses or bacteria that cause STDs can enter the body through tiny cuts or tears in the mouth and anus, as well as the genitals.

STDs also spread easily because you can’t tell whether someone has an infection. In fact, some people with STDs don’t even know that they have them. These people are in danger of passing an infection on to their sex partners without even realizing it.

The first line of defense is education!

So once again as parents what can we do to protect our kids. The first line of defense is education. If we want our children to have our values, our morals then we must teach them ourselves.

Studies show that kids want sex education from their own moms, dads and guardians. But did you know that when you teach your child the facts about sex, your child is:
 less likely to have sexual intercourse as a teen
 less likely to become pregnant or get someone pregnant as a teen
 more likely to talk to you about other important issues in their life.

The time to start talking is now!

As I said in a previous video, the time to start talking is today even if your kids are preschool. Again I have seen articles where the advice was, if you are too embarrassed to have the talk yourself, ask a doctor or clergyman or someone else to do it”. No! You do it! If you are embarrassed say, “I am embarrassed” and do it anyway. Your child’s life may depend on you. So it’s time to start talking. For an excellent guide on “How to have the sex talk at any age” see the website by Jennifer Wolf, “About Single Parents.com” I have provided a link to this site and many more valuable resources in my written blog which can be found at singleparenting.us
Please subscribe to my channel. Also please leave me a comment and tell me what you think or ask a question. And please click “like” and also “share” this video with your friends. Thank you!

Finally, go check out my website singleparenting.us. Let’s get to know each other. Good luck in the days ahead. My wish for you is that your children grow up healthy, and contribute to society in a positive way. I’m here to help you get there. We’ll talk again. This is Len. Bye for now!

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“Talking with your teen about sex” part 3 (sexting)

Hi, It’s Len. The creator of singleparenting.us and author of the book, “Adventures in Single Parenting”.
Welcome to this video, part 3 of my 3 part series on Talking to your teens about sex. Today I want to cover the topic of sexting.

Wikipedia defines Sexting as “The act of sending sexually explicit messages or photographs, primarily between mobile phones”. This is a rather recent concept first reported in 2005 and depends on the advent of Smart Phones and the new high speed mobile technology and networks. What is surprising is the rapidity with which it is gaining popularity and apparent social acceptance.

In a recent study published in The Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, researchers questioned a culturally diverse sample of 964 Houston-area students between the ages of 14 and 19 from seven public high schools and amongst other things found that 27.6% of teens reported having texted or emailed a naked picture of themselves. Of course as you might expect, girls were asked to send a naked picture of themselves much more frequently than boys.

If your teenager’s phone has naked pictures in the sent folder, there’s a pretty good chance they’re doing a lot more than just that. The study found that 77 percent of girls and 82 percent of boys who are sexting are no longer virgins. It had especially bad news for the girls sending naked pictures.
“(T)een girls who engaged in sexting behaviors also had a higher prevalence of risky sex behaviors, including multiple partners and using drugs or alcohol before sex,” the study found. “Thus, among girls, the use of sexting behaviors appears to coincide with much higher engagement in risky sex behaviors.”

Read more at http://www.inquisitr.com/271246/sexting-shocker-28-percent-of-teens-sending-fully-nude-pictures-of-themselves/#V1F0ZyZ9pTJvJS6J.99

As parents, need to know what all the settings are on the different services that our children are using. We can join and have our own accounts on facebook, Twitter etc

We also need to talk to our kids about the risks of having a social media account. Some risks include being stalked by a predator. Some girls have learned the hard way that their boyfriends cannot be trusted with nude photos, anything on the web (that includes the cell phone network) is public information.

We can follow our kids and have them follow us back.

If the kids protest, remind them that social media is public viewing gallery and anything they put out there can and will be visible for years.

The following site can help us stay in touch with what our kids are doing on line.

http://www.minormonitor.com/

Finally there is the legal implication. In most states and many countries possession of nude pictures of someone under 18 is illegal and can and has been prosecuted as a felony, even if you yourself and under 18 and it is a picture of you. Again from Wikipedia, “Some teenagers who have texted photographs of themselves, or of their friends or partners, have been charged with distribution of child pornography, while those who have received the images have been charged with possession of child pornography; in some cases, the possession charge has been applied to school administrators who have investigated sexting incidents as well.”

Finally as parents, we need to be aware of the “lingo” our kids are using so we can interpret their messages. The list below comes from: http://www.noslang.com/sexting.php
Common Sexting Slang Terms
Warning: some of these terms are vulgar. This list is nowhere close to exhaustive, words can be combined, removed, and invented on the fly.
8 Oral Sex
143 I Love You
cu46 See You For Sex
DUM Do You Masturbate?
GNOC Get Naked On Cam
GYPO Get Your Pants Off
GNRN Get Naked right Now
FMH Fuck Me Harder
IWS I Want Sex
IIT Is It Tight?
Q2C Quick To Come
RUH Are You Horny?
TDTM Talk Dirty To Me
S2R Send To Receive
NIFOC Naked In Front Of Computer
SorG Straight Or Gay?
JO Jerk Off
PAW Parents Are Watching
PIR Parent In Room
POS Parent Over Shoulder
YWS You Want Sex
WYCM Will You Call M?e
RU18 Are You 18?
CD9 / Code 9 Parent / Adult around
NALOPKT Not A Lot Of People Know This

My written blog contains additional information and can be found at singleparenting.us
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Finally, go check out my website singleparenting.us. Let’s get to know each other. Good luck in the days ahead. My wish for you is that your children grow up healthy, and contribute to society in a positive way. I’m here to help you get there. We’ll talk again. This is Len. Bye for now!

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“Talking with Your Teens About Sex” Part 2 (Teen pregnancy)

 

The number of teens giving birth in the U.S. dropped again in 2010, according to a government report, with nearly every state seeing a decrease. Nationally, the rate fell 9 percent to about 34 per 1,000 girls ages 15 through 19, and the drop was seen among all racial and ethnic groups. Mississippi continues to have the highest teen birth rate, with 55 births per 1,000 girls. New Hampshire has the lowest rate at just under 16 births per 1,000 girls.

By Amanda Peterson Beadle on Apr 10, 2012 at 1:50 pm

This is the lowest national rate for teen births since the Centers for Disease Control began tracking it in 1940, and CDC officials attributed the decline to pregnancy prevention efforts. Other reports show that teenagers are having less sex and using contraception more often. Studies have backed this up. Researchers at the University of Washington in Seattle found that teenagers who received some type of comprehensive sex education were 60 percent less likely to get pregnant or get someone else pregnant. And in 2007, a federal report showed that abstinence-only programs had “no impacts on rates of sexual abstinence.”

But 37 states require sex education that includes abstinence, 26 of which require that abstinence be stressed as the best method. Additionally, research shows that abstinence-only strategies could deter contraceptive use among teenagers, thus increasing their risk of unintended pregnancy.

For example, take the states with the highest and lowest teen pregnancy rates. Mississippi does not require sex education in schools, but when it is taught, abstinence-only education is the state standard. New Mexico, which has the second highest teen birth rate, does not require sex ed and has no requirements on what should be included when it is taught. server ip . New Hampshire, on the other hand, requires comprehensive sex education in schools that includes abstinence and information about condoms and contraception.

Please subscribe to my channel. Also please leave me a comment and tell me what you think or ask a question.  And please click “like” and also “share” this video with your friends. Thank you!

 

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