“Talking with your teen about sex” part 3 (sexting)

Hi, It’s Len. The creator of singleparenting.us and author of the book, “Adventures in Single Parenting”.
Welcome to this video, part 3 of my 3 part series on Talking to your teens about sex. Today I want to cover the topic of sexting.

Wikipedia defines Sexting as “The act of sending sexually explicit messages or photographs, primarily between mobile phones”. This is a rather recent concept first reported in 2005 and depends on the advent of Smart Phones and the new high speed mobile technology and networks. What is surprising is the rapidity with which it is gaining popularity and apparent social acceptance.

In a recent study published in The Archives of Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, researchers questioned a culturally diverse sample of 964 Houston-area students between the ages of 14 and 19 from seven public high schools and amongst other things found that 27.6% of teens reported having texted or emailed a naked picture of themselves. Of course as you might expect, girls were asked to send a naked picture of themselves much more frequently than boys.

If your teenager’s phone has naked pictures in the sent folder, there’s a pretty good chance they’re doing a lot more than just that. The study found that 77 percent of girls and 82 percent of boys who are sexting are no longer virgins. It had especially bad news for the girls sending naked pictures.
“(T)een girls who engaged in sexting behaviors also had a higher prevalence of risky sex behaviors, including multiple partners and using drugs or alcohol before sex,” the study found. “Thus, among girls, the use of sexting behaviors appears to coincide with much higher engagement in risky sex behaviors.”

Read more at http://www.inquisitr.com/271246/sexting-shocker-28-percent-of-teens-sending-fully-nude-pictures-of-themselves/#V1F0ZyZ9pTJvJS6J.99

As parents, need to know what all the settings are on the different services that our children are using. We can join and have our own accounts on facebook, Twitter etc

We also need to talk to our kids about the risks of having a social media account. Some risks include being stalked by a predator. Some girls have learned the hard way that their boyfriends cannot be trusted with nude photos, anything on the web (that includes the cell phone network) is public information.

We can follow our kids and have them follow us back.

If the kids protest, remind them that social media is public viewing gallery and anything they put out there can and will be visible for years.

The following site can help us stay in touch with what our kids are doing on line.


Finally there is the legal implication. In most states and many countries possession of nude pictures of someone under 18 is illegal and can and has been prosecuted as a felony, even if you yourself and under 18 and it is a picture of you. Again from Wikipedia, “Some teenagers who have texted photographs of themselves, or of their friends or partners, have been charged with distribution of child pornography, while those who have received the images have been charged with possession of child pornography; in some cases, the possession charge has been applied to school administrators who have investigated sexting incidents as well.”

Finally as parents, we need to be aware of the “lingo” our kids are using so we can interpret their messages. The list below comes from: http://www.noslang.com/sexting.php
Common Sexting Slang Terms
Warning: some of these terms are vulgar. This list is nowhere close to exhaustive, words can be combined, removed, and invented on the fly.
8 Oral Sex
143 I Love You
cu46 See You For Sex
DUM Do You Masturbate?
GNOC Get Naked On Cam
GYPO Get Your Pants Off
GNRN Get Naked right Now
FMH Fuck Me Harder
IWS I Want Sex
IIT Is It Tight?
Q2C Quick To Come
RUH Are You Horny?
TDTM Talk Dirty To Me
S2R Send To Receive
NIFOC Naked In Front Of Computer
SorG Straight Or Gay?
JO Jerk Off
PAW Parents Are Watching
PIR Parent In Room
POS Parent Over Shoulder
YWS You Want Sex
WYCM Will You Call M?e
RU18 Are You 18?
CD9 / Code 9 Parent / Adult around
NALOPKT Not A Lot Of People Know This

My written blog contains additional information and can be found at singleparenting.us
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Finally, go check out my website singleparenting.us. Let’s get to know each other. Good luck in the days ahead. My wish for you is that your children grow up healthy, and contribute to society in a positive way. I’m here to help you get there. We’ll talk again. This is Len. Bye for now!


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